Jun 1, 2012

Monthly Movie Recap - May 2012

This month has combined some of the best and worst I've seen this year (so far anyway!)
As always, clicking on a title link takes you to Amazon where you can order the movie and support the site.

Boy Eats Girl (2005)
Pretty fun horror/comedy. Although it's hard to call if it wants to be a zombie movie or infection movie. When you get "it" you have no vital signs and crave human snacks but there is a cure for "it."

Cool: High school is always a good setting for zombies; great slaughter scene with farm machinery
Lame: Kinda sucks for all the people/zombies that they had to kill that could have been cured
Rating: 6.5/10, good choice if you're looking for something different

Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time
Singer is back rockin hair that would do any 80's band proud. It's always dicey when you try to take a medieval-era character into the modern world. This is one of those times when it comes out more as a comedy than it probably should have. I just saw the original for the first time last month and this is a major letdown after that awesomeness.

Cool: Kari Wuhrer, Sarah Douglas (Ursa from Superman)
Lame: Missing just about everything that made the first one awesome; have seen better fight choreography on Hercules/Xena
Rating: 4/10, there's a reason it's not on DVD. Good for bad movie night

Planet of the Vampires (1965)
A spaceship is sent to investigate a crash on a mysterious planet and they find the crew of the crashed ship went crazy and killed each other! Did they really go crazy or are they being controlled by an alien force?

Cool: Wanna-be X-Men spacesuits
Lame: "Vampires" only in a very loose sense
Rating: 6/10, double feature with "It! The Terror from Beyond Space" before you see Prometheus

*Alien 3 (1992)
Haven't seen the last two installments since theaters. Rewatched them to follow along with NowPlayingPodcast.com movie reviews. I watched the "Assembly Cut" which was even more confusing since the Alien is birthed from an ox instead of a dog in this version.

Cool: There's a couple of cool ideas tucked in here and there
Lame: This cut is extra long and, for me, more boring; Newt & Hicks gone
Rating: 4/10, low on excitement

*Alien Resurrection (1997)
Special Edition cut. Still not as good as the first two but much more fun to watch than 3. Had a good time with it up until the end where the hybrid Alien is introduced.

Cool: Clone Ripley; the Betty crew need their own prequel spinoff
Lame: The new hybrid Alien; weird pseudo sex scene with Alien and Ripley
Rating: 5.5/10

The Last Lovecraft: Relic of Cthulhu (2009)
The last descendant of H.P. Lovecraft is stuck in a dead end job when he is suddenly thrust into the world of Cthulhu and forced to protect the relic that will wake his eternal sleep. This is a fantastic indie film tribute to Cthulhu!

Cool: Comedy/horror is mixed well; great realization of Mythos creatures
Lame: I was hoping for more of a climactic ending the way it was building throughout the film
Rating: 6.5/10, the creators are truly Cthulhu geeks

The Avengers (2012)
Not much to say that hasn't been said. Loved it and can't wait for the BluRay!

Cool: Managing to fit all these characters in one movie and give them time to shine
Lame: Hawkeye kinda gets shafted; wish they'd gone more modern Steve Rogers for Cap's outfit
Rating: 9/10, this is how superhero movies should be: fun!

The Omega Man (1971)
Charlton Heston battling albino hippies? No thank you. I prefer Last Man on Earth and I Am Legend to this version.

Cool: He does meet up with other survivors so it's not as grim as other versions
Lame: I swear Chuck must be related to Matthew McConaughey because he is shirtless not only here but in many other movies!
Rating: 5/10

Megaforce (1982)
Another one of those "I don't know how I missed this during childhood" movies. If Michael Bay made a student film in 1982, you'd get Megaforce! There's lots of military hardware and things blowing up with the thinnest of plots holding it all together.

Cool: Great vehicle designs
Lame: Skintight jumpsuits; confusing comradery between the head good and bad guy
Rating: 5/10, cheesy action

Macabre (1958)
Considered to be William Castle's first venture into using gimmicks to sell tickets (interesting write up on there here). Although Castle's usually associated with horror this is more of a ticking clock suspense whodunit.

Cool: Keeps you guessing until the surprise ending; Mr Howell is the sheriff!
Lame: Got nothing
Rating: 5.5/10

Beastmaster: The Eye of Braxus (1996)
Couldn't find a trailer, so enjoy the climactic battle between barbarian and demon Braxus.
While it gets back to the original world, it's still not as good as the original.

Cool: decent (but wasted) cast with Tony Todd and David Warner; more beast action than 2
Lame: The demon looks like a reject from the Dinosaurs TV show; laughable fight scenes
Rating: 5/10, hey it's better than part 2

Demonwarp (1988)
The 80s' are where it's at for out there horror! A murderous Bigfoot, some gore and a little T&A.

Cool: Bigfoot, zombies and aliens. Oh my!
Lame: The low budget is painfully obvious at times
Rating: 4/10, considering the $250, 000 budget it's not horrible

X-Men: First Class (2011) 
Yes, finally got around to seeing this. Fantastic, intelligent superhero movie. Since X-Men were my gateway into comics in the 80s, I usually don't like when they create new continuity for movies but this was done so well, only a couple small things bothered me.

Cool: I wasn't on board with the retro when I first heard about it, but they kill it
Lame: Doesn't quite fit in X-movie continuity; Emma Frost kind of felt underused here
Rating: 9.5/10,  a more mature superhero movie for the thinkers

Swamp Women aka Swamp Diamonds (1955)
One of Roger Corman's first films. An undercover policewoman helps three female cons escape from prison to locate a stash of hidden diamonds. Along the way, the abduct Mannix himself and trouble starts a-brewin between the ladies.

Cool: Oh so bad, it's good; featured on MST3k as Swamp Diamonds
Lame: How much stock footage can you spot?
Rating: 4/10, I was oddly entertained!

Machete (2010)
Fan favorite character actor Danny Trejo finally stars in his own grindhouse action movie.

Cool: All star cast, attractive ladies and plenty of over the top violence!
Lame: Nothing bad here but the occasional acting, but it's right at home
Rating: 8/10, it's not as cukoo-pants as Hobo with a Shotgun but Rodriguez knows how to do grindhouse right

Shark Night (2011)
I thought I was in for another roller coaster like Piranha 3D. While the effects are generally better, everything else is on par with a SyFy original movie.

Cool: Um...Katherine McPhee in a bikni? And I always like Donal Logue
Lame: PG-13 rating kills any chance this movie could be the next Piranha 3D
Rating: 4/10, I can only recommend this is your tween is having a sleepover

New: 14
Rewatch: 2, if you count different versions of movies I'd previously seen
To-Date Total: 49 New, 9 Rewatch  

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