Ted (2012)
In the interest of full disclosure (or humble bragging) I was an unpaid extra in this movie during the concert scene. I won't know if I actually ended up on screen until I can freeze frame it.
You know how you see a movie and walk out wondering why they put all the good stuff in the trailers? Not the case here, they go way beyond what's in the trailers in terms of crude humor.
Cool: Giovanni Ribisi steals all his scenes; Guest cameos; an 80s cult icon playing a hilarious version of himself
Lame: If you don't like Family Guy and/or crude humor, you will not like this movie
Rating: 8/10, despite the cliche plot of growing up and having to choose best friend or girlfriend, an R rated teddy bear in the mix goes a long way to changing up the story
Billed as a horror comedy, it's seriously lacking in both departments. If Kaley Cuoco wasn't in this I probably would have bailed out after 20 minutes and even now I question that choice.
Cool: -?-
Lame: Kills are fairly mundane as is a lot of the movie
Rating: 2/10, probably the second most torturous movie I've forced on myself this year
True Bloodthirst (2012)
In this SyFy Original, vampires and humans co-exist in a not-too-distant future Romania thanks to a new synthetic blood substitute. And by co-exist, I mean the vamps are confined to a walled off area, sort of like District 9. But someone's spiking the synth-blood and it turns the normal vamps into savage man-bats.
Cool: Andrew Lee Potts from Primevil; It's a step above the standard SyFy movie in almost every way...
Lame: but it drags along at times; Man-bats are cool but move so quick they're usually a blur; not sure why Potts (a Brit) is trying to be American when the rest of the cast has accents
Rating: 4/10, good ideas, meh execution
Zombies vs Strippers (2012)
The staff of a failing strip club prepare to have one last night of fun before closing down when a zombie outbreak pops up. If you're familiar with Full Moon at all, you know what you're in for here (see Cool below). Even if you're not, the title pretty much sums it up. If you want something a little raunchier and better production value, check out Zombie Strippers.
Cool: Cheezy B-movie fun; stereotypical characters; good gore effects; plenty of toplessness
Lame: One of the strippers must be the "star" because she never removes her top, what up with that?
Rating: 5.5/10, recommended for a "sitting around and drinking while watching a movie" night
Futurama: Bender's Big Score (2007)
I don't know if it's because they have all of time and space to play in or the fact that it hasn't been continuously running for decades, but Futurama is consistently funnier than The Simpsons for me. But that's more a commentary on the shows and not really related to this movie. This is their first of four direct-to-video movies that made up the show's fifth season and their return after cancellation.
Cool: It's Futurama, just longer; time travel hijinks; makking fun of Fox for cancelling them
Lame: Wrinkly pink aliens, ew
Rating: 7.5/10
Image from DVD Drive-In |
aka Night Caller or Blood Beast from Outer Space
Very sad I couldn't find a trailer for this one. An alien from Jupiter places magazine ads for female models in order to capture them for breeding purposes. Yes, the plot sounds crazy but everyone is playing it straight and combined with the camera work, it's something to see.
Cool: young John Saxon; moody noir-ish feel; great camera work
Lame: the ending is a little anti-climactic
Rating: 6.5/10, a well done B-movie worth seeking out
And that's it! Told you it would be a short one this month.
Total
New: 6
Year To-Date Total
70 New, 10 Rewatch
Just saw Ted. I think the last time I laughed that much at a movie it was Team America. At points I was literally in tears laughing. What an awesome movie.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I wasn't expecting it to be as funny as it was. The whole Flash Gordon thing had me rolling, that is maybe the best thing I've seen in movies recently.
DeleteThat was the bit the floored me too. That whole scene in fact. But also the Patrick Stewart narrative was inspired! Nobody else could've delivered those lines in such a funny way.
DeleteYou convinced me...I'm goin to see TED!!
ReplyDelete