Monthly Movie Recap - July 2013

We've got another interesting assortment this month including some blaxploitation, sharksploitation and lots of guns! While I've got your attention up here, do you watch the trailers in these movie recaps? I put up a poll so vote or leave comments!

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013)
This isn't one for everyone. It took me a bit to get into the vibe of it, but once I did it was a lot of fun. The setting is medieval-ish, the weapons are steampunky and the characters talk like they're from a more modern time. It's like a second cousin to Army of Darkness.

Cool: The witch character designs are fantastic. Gore is mostly played for laughs (splatstick). The troll is all practical effects which makes him awesome!
Lame: You don't get to see much of the witch designs during the big fight
Rating: 7/10, they knew what they wanted it to be and did it

Cleopatra Jones (1973)
This is only my third venture into blaxploitation but I'm diggin it! There's plenty of karate and shootouts as Cleo tries to clean up the local drug trade. She's even got a few Bond-esque tricks to keep it interesting. The trailer can pretty much tell you if you should watch this (you should!).

Cool: Shelly Winters is a riot with her bumbling gang. Great car chase in the LA waterway.
Lame: I know there was a sequel but I feel like this could have been a longer series
Rating: 6.5/10, Cleo is feisty and foxy!

The Lone Ranger (2013)
aka Tonto, guest starring the Lone Ranger, but what else would you expect? I like what Depp did but I really think "less is more" should have been the rule with more focus on the title character. The one thing I don't think anyone can argue about on this movie is that the scenery is beautiful, as it should be.

Cool: Mmm, cannibals! Silver steals his scenes. The climax was well done but...
Lame: it took about 30 minutes too long to get there. Sometimes felt like it was more Tonto's story.
Rating: 6/10, I'm up for more now that the origin story is done

Battle Royale (2001)

I know some fans of this work were in an uproar about the Hunger Games being a poor knockoff but I think there's big enough differences that both can exist. This movie is brutal and phenomenal at the same time.

Cool: All around great performances but Kou Shibasaki (as Mitsuko Souma) totally steals all her scenes
Lame: If you're going to force a bunch of teenagers to kill each other, at least televise it. Am I right?
Rating: 8.5/10, cannot recommend this enough if you haven't seen it

V for Vendetta (2006)
What's the difference between a hero, a rebel and a terrorist? It all depends on your point of view. I couldn't help but think while watching this how little changes in the movie here and there could make V come off as evil and not the person you want to root for.

Cool: The Guy Fawkes mask has become a symbol for activists/protesters in the real world, being used by groups like Anonymous
Lame: Nothing like torturing someone to get them to see your point of view
Rating: 8/10

Sharknado (2013)
It's the movie that took Twitter by storm! If you've been following along with my movie recaps, you know I like to indulge in these SyFy schlockfests when I can and Sharknado does not disappoint. Actually, it does...hard. And that's what makes it fun to watch. But seriously, it's sharks shooting out of a tornado and attacking people, what else can you expect? I'm moving that the English language replaces the phrase "train wreck" (used to describe something so bad you can't look away) with Sharknado.

Cool: This!
Lame: The people in this movie hate sharks to the point where they must kill them even when the shark is on the ground helpless. Call the ASPCA!
Rating: 3/10 (actual), 7/10 (stupid fun)

Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox (2013)
I'm mostly a Marvel person when it comes to comics so these DC direct to video flicks are always a treat because I don't have any baggage going into them. This one is another "not for the kids" animation with a great story.

Cool: I love alternate timeline/What If type stories; Flash has always been one of my favorites so it was nice to see him get some time in the spotlight.
Lame: The anime inspired style doesn't work well for everyone
Rating: 8/10

Pacific Rim (2013)
I've been a long time fan that 70s anime and giant monster movies so this hit all the sweet spots for me. This was the one movie I had to see in IMAX no matter what and I'm glad I did. There were so many little things they brought in to the fights from anime. I had the biggest grin on my face during most fight scenes.

Cool: Giant mechs brawling with giant lizards, what more could you want?
Lame: The characters could have used more rounding out but I hear there's at least 30 minutes of cut footage. Here's hoping for an extended BluRay cut!
Rating: 9/10, if you haven't seen it and are thinking about it, this is absolutely a must see on the big screen. Go IMAX if you can!

Atlantic Rim (2013) aka Attack From Beneath
I mean, logically, it's the only thing I could follow up Pacific Rim with, right? Where Sharknado, also made by Asylum, was so bad it was pretty ok, this is flat out bad. I felt like I was going back and watching a Saturday morning show I loved as a kid and couldn't believe how awful it is...except this was recently made.

Cool: The monster design is ok, I guess?
Lame: The biggest culprits are the "acting" and it never feeling like the actors are where we're supposed to believe they are
Rating: 2/10, pretty much any other movie with giant lizards and/or mechs has to be better than this

Month Total

 New:9

Year to Date

New: 51, Rewatch:1